If I trip them...will they learn to catch themselves?

As parents it's natural to worry about our kids, but when is it too much? Think back when you were little. Didn't your dad teach you to ride a two-wheeler? The promises of "I got you, I won't let go" could be heard all the way down the street. That is until you realized he's lied and you were on your own. Only then did we crash and burn and most have a scar to prove it. After tears and drops of blood did we not realize in our parents "little lie" that is was then we discovered we could ride a bike?

Todays standards are a bit different. "Helicopter-parenting" is the normal. Or is it?

Kids go through phases, we all know that. One day your on top of the world. Good at sports, you have hobbies and great grades in school and awesome friends. Next thing you know they're moody, disinterested in everything and grades slip and those BFF's stab you in the back to be popular. But I ask you - if this isn't the time to be a "Helicopter-parent" when is it?

I have 5 wonderful children - who I know are not perfect. Believe me...been there done that. And yes..I am guilty of "Helicopter-parenting." But that's the problem....I forgot. It's ok for them to not be perfect, they're kids.

Watching your child fail makes you feel helpless, angry and sad. You worry about everything from your child’s self-esteem and social development to their future success.

That's why we're the parents. We're supposed to teach them to be able to recover from those obstacles that they will come across over and over as each phase of their lives come and go.

I used to have a huge problem with my youngest son. No motivation to do anything but play video games. Solution...limit video games right? Nope back fired on me. He started hating me because I'm no fun, blah blah. Get the picture. So what am I to do?

We forced him to do sport. This was good right? He's outside, exercising, making friends. No he's a good kid and was just doing it because he knew it would make mom happy. He did the same thing with drum lessons. Tried it, didn't like it, quit.

Disappointing...but for whom? Why am I disappointed? He's the one bright enough to know what he likes and doesn't like. I have to give him credit for at least trying, but I also have to acknowledge him for knowing when sometimes "things" just aren't for him. So what do we do?

Keep trying. Let him try. Even let him fail.

Teach them there's natural consequences for the decisions they do make and stick to it. That it's OK to be a kid and just sometimes do "Nothing." This is how they find out who they are and how to express it without the fear of disappointing you. Because lets face it, kids will do almost anything to please a parent...even if they scream and kick the whole way and act like they don't care.

Be supportive in their decisions, if it's sports, hobbies or school. Even if it's not "What you want" for them.

When their BBF turn on them, and they will. Be there.
When they fail a test... Be there.
You don't have to cut the proverbial "cord" just yet..just prepare them for when it starts to unravel.

Ask yourself....

If my child has too much homework am I going to do it for them?

If my child doesn't like playing sports anymore do I let them find a new interest or do I make them do it and they resent it?

Do I let my child be friends with someone I know isn't a good friend or do I teach my child what it means to be a good friend and let them decide?

As people how do we learn? Most of the time we fail.

It's like being a baby.

It's what we're told and shown afterwards that make the difference on wither we learned from it or not.


Just be there to bandage them up if they need it. How will you know if they need you? You'll know - your Mom & Dad.

Let them be the moody, pre-teens, adolescents, young adults. It's all a phase. We turned out ok didn't we? Maybe a little better than our parents thought, even through all the grief I'm sure we put them all through.

So I ask you again.

If your child trips....don't you want them to learn to catch themselves?

But I have a Cell Phone Call!

In a world with so much technology and opportunities available to us when did our priorities change?

Was it when we fell in love, got married, had children?

We're all guilty of it, if you say your not - you're lying to yourself.

I'm only saying this because I had a friend tell me about a situation she came upon this week.

She walked out of a store to see a baby in a stroller all wrapped up in the heat..no mom to be found. She waited for 15 minutes before a "Mom" appeared from the parking lot. Apparently she went to take things to her car (minus the baby) and took a phone call.

Are we so distracted by the almighty cell phone text or call we need to put our precious children at danger from heat stroke, kidnapping by validating our actions with.....

But I have a phone call!

Slow down people..think real hard...

1) That's what voice mail is for

2) texting and "looking" at texts is illegal while driving (besides it can wait..seriously..it can) unless you're willing to "accidentally" run over my son or daughter while you weren't looking. I'm not willing to do that to your child.

3) If your toddler is begging you to go potty..put down the Blackberry, stop "Face booking" your toddler just peed on the floor and deal with it.

Life is short and precious...step back and let the machine get it.

By the way...my friend said she gave it to that mother for leaving her baby on the hottest day by herself..let alone for 15 mins.

What would you do?

This Heats A Killer... Literally!

Today was not only a very hot record breaking day in Southern California in the middle of September, but it was a killer...literally!

Due to an unfortunate accidental moving of Bunny Avril's cage he succumbed to todays heat wave and laid down and died.

For those of you who know our house, we have no AC and face the wrong way for our house to have a nice breeze. This means we have to keep all blinds closed and windows shut until 4PM on hot days like today was.

It was at 4Pm when I opened the blinds to my horror to see the bunny's cage sitting next to the sliding glass door in the straight sun, covered with his "Fall" blanket for shelter from seasons dew drops.

It was too late..he was gone.

Oh the realization of what was to come... this is my daughter's 2nd bunny death. Five yrs ago April Bunny was bitten by a fly that laid fly eggs in her and we did not know this until she fell over one day and we discovered she was being eaten alive by maggots that decided to hatch on a very familiar record breaking hot day. Once again untimely heat has been our bunnies demise.

We will miss you Avril Bunny! RIP with your sister April Bunny.

on a different note, me being the mom I am that tries to find the humor in the bad realized the irony in my daughter having a "Bunny Suicide" calendar on her wall.

One of my friends asked...is there a picture of a bunny in a cage in the sun?

Sorry Alicia..I tried not to laugh! Really I did. :-)

I Should Have Been Born a Guinea Pig!

When did it become necessary to be your own doctor? In the "Good 'ol Days" you used to be able to make a trip to your family doctor to help you figure out what's was bugging you...no pun intended. Now with HMO's, PPO's and all the other O's you practically have to be an MD in order to get yourself diagnosed properly or a guinea pig!

Even though there's the wonderful world of internet with millions of advice and medical websites it still amazes me how us patients get lumped into groups, like there's only 5 different things in the world that could be wrong. What ever happened to viewing symptoms, ruling out signs.

Are we creating strain resistant bacteria by assuming medicine "A" will cure all?

I recently have been through the ringer trying to figure out what is wrong with me. All started with what seemed like allergies gone awry...causing wheezing usual breathing strains for the 4 times a year when seasons change. But alas, I only had an expired inhaler.

We all know where this is going..trip to the Dr's office to play the "I've been through this before so can I have the inhaler already game?"

Of course it's not that simple. Well long story short...wheezing turned coughing...to sever coughing to absolute snowball!

2 inhalers, 2 shots, 2 kinds of medicines later and 1 x-ray later....pneumonia. (even though I have no fever) Or so the Dr. thought. Turns out nope...but take the course of medications anyways.

Now 2 weeks of sever coughing, if you've never had that it can be quite painful for your ribcage and the muscles around it. We're talking total inflammation...oh and I lost my voice.

This being very ironic since I feel like Dr's don't really listen to you when your in the office.

Today as a result of the medication cocktail they have me on I got to experience severe vertigo, listlessness (according to my husband) and passing out with pain in my chest. Not fun!

Super mommy was on her way to the ER as directed..by her Dr. Go figure.

After a nasty nasal swab test (BTW very painful..they lie...Google it!) to test for whooping cough...which I'm pretty positive will be negative since I have no symptoms other than a cough...minus the Whooping. They figured since I've had this for 2 weeks it's Bronchitis gone bad. Duhhhh...

So off one medicine the one I'm to take for pneumonia, but my x-ray says I don't have (which is good) and on to a different medication. Oh and finally medicine for the ribcage pain when I do cough or breath deeply...yeah!

What a crazy few weeks....finally am starting to feel better...can breath, can talk a little in my "Sexy Voice" and thinking clearly.

Probably a good thing I wasn't born a guinea pig....he started to wheeze and the vet prescribed the wrong medicine. He died.